Archive for September, 2010


Princess Salon Parties

In Burbank, everyone owns a hair salon. Alright, this probably isn’t true. But it would be cool, because then salon services would be really cheap.

I think that woman’s obsessions with salons start when they are little. They start when their salon-obsessed mothers decide that they need to have a princess salon party. Not only are the little girls being encouraged to buy fancy clothes, but they are being introduced to the salon world early on. At a young age, they are hooked on pricey manicures, pedicures, and other services.  I’m not sure how smart that is.

It’s all fine and dandy to have a party to relax and pamper yourself, but these are little girls who will beg and BEG until they get what they want. The day after the party, the little girls will all be begging their parents to bring them back the very next day. These parents are really going to regret the fact that they let their little girls go to this party. They now have to deal with a whole ten years or so of taking their daughters to the salon on a regular basis.  They now will regret sending their daughter to a princess salon party forever.

I think Chanel consignment is a good business to get into. You can probably find used Chanel purses and such just about anywhere. I’ve never looked, but you can probably go to the nearest DI, and find a Chanel purse there that someone didn’t know what it was. You can then take it to Chanel consignment and get a lot of money out of it! I think this sounds like a great plan. I’ll have to head over to DI after work.

Then again, people probably don’t take nice Chanel purses to DI. People who own Chanel probably realize how much they cost  since they probably paid a whole lot for that purse. They probably aren’t to just take it to DI. They will probably do something more useful with it, like sell it for a lot of money. I just said “probably”, a lot.  Anyways, maybe Chanel consignment wouldn’t be the best business to get into. It sounds tedious and complicated. I don’t  like things that are tedious and complicated. I’m a fan of things that are simple and straight forward. I have no idea how much purses are worth. My favorite purse is from Ecuador. I paid three dollars for it.

Food, Or Lack Of

My kitchen cabinets are just about empty right now. I guess that’s how it goes when you are a college student. I always thought that Ramen Noodles was a big joke. I moved out and went grocery shopping. While I was shopping in Maceys, I passed the roman noodles. They were so cheap! I could get them for like 10 cents! That is 10 cents for a whole meal! My kitchen cabinets have a big box of Ramen Noodles in them now, just not a whole lot of anything else. It’s a little bit sad. I wonder if Ramen Noodles are just a Utah thing, or if they are common to all the other college students too. Hmm. I wonder…

I think that’s part of the fun of college. Sometimes you come home from work and realize that you really have no food. You literally have nothing in your pantry, fridge, or kitchen cabinets. It is kind of discouraging, but kind of awesome at the same time. It’s definitely an adventure!  College has it’s perks. Those perks do not include having a million loud roommates when you are trying to sleep, but there are other things that are perks.

Ummm…yay for not living at home!

If you live in Scottsdale, or anywhere else where women live, you are probably surrounded by weight loss ads. It’s kind of amazing how much variety there is in weight loss products. People are coming up with crazy stuff, and people are actually buying it! It’s insane! I googled, “Crazy weight loss products”. The first one that came up was a dumbbell phone. You can actually attach a dumbbell to your phone, and then their fitness experts will call you eight times a day. To me, that seems a little extreme. But people actually buy that kind of stuff! Crazy!

There are all kinds of crazy weight loss diets too.  There is one where you mix water, pure lemon juice, cyan pepper, and pure maple syrup. It’s “Lemonade”. You drink that, and only that, for ten days. No other food or anything. Oh, except for the saltwater flush every morning, consisting of 4 cups of saltwater. Gross huh? Actually that one is a pretty good cleanse for your body. It is still really gross though.  Spicy lemonade would be disgusting.

In conclusion, there are a whole lot of weird weight loss things going on. You should probably just stick with diet and exercise.

I hate traffic. It’s really not the traffic itself though. The rules, the roads, that’s all fine. The problem is the really dumb people who are driving around like idiots. I get really mad when I drive sometimes. I don’t like it when people don’t think when they drive. But what happens when your drive to the wholesale fashion jewelry mart and the road situation turns awkward?

I’m not talking about when you pull up to a light and glance at the person next to you to see him picking his nose. He realizes you saw him, and a very awkward moment follows until the light turns green. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about the times when you are really annoyed. Your limits are finally passed, and you give them the honk, or you throw your arms in the air and give them a dirty look. After the fact, you drive past them to find that they are someone you know! Suddenly getting to the wholesale fashion jewlery mart doesn’t seem so important. You are not worried about how you are going to avoid your neighbor for the next little while.

So maybe this is not so fun if it happens to you, but it is seriously funny when you hear about it happening to other people!

Have you ever wondered what social security lawyers do? …Neither have I. The truth is that I don’t really need to know what social security lawyers do. It sounds kind of boring, and I am already bored at work.

You know those subjects that come up that the other person thinks is really interesting? The second they bring it up, you think, “Well this is going to be a boring conversation”. You then paste on that fake smile and turn on the automatic nod, then you completely zone out. We all do it, don’t even deny it. Sometimes there are just subjects that you couldn’t care less about.

This sounds a little bit weird, but I’m kind of a fan of socially awkward situations. For example, the fake smile. It is used in just about every socially awkward situation you can think of. My roommates and I were talking about the fake smile the other day. Like when the guy you are kind of dating says “I love you”, prematurely. One of two things will happen in this situation. You will blurt out, “I love you too!”, just because you are supposed to. Or, you will paste on that fake smile and buy yourself an extra 3-6 seconds to think of how you are going to turn him down.

So, whether it’s talking about something like social security lawyers, or pasting on that fake smile to buy you some time after an awkward “I love you”, either way those situations are just very amusing!

Milk and Cereal (Milk and Cereal), Cereal and Milk! (Cereal and Milk!)…..This song is stuck in my head this morning. I can’t get it out. It got stuck there when I ate a bowl of cereal. Oh well, everyone can just listen to me sing it all day!

So, I am in a pretty good mood today. Yesterday was a good day, today is FRIDAY, AND I had wild cherry Pepsi! Alright so maybe my mood has something to do with all that caffeine, but still! I think I’m okay with that.

So, yesterday I was flipping through TV channels and I wondered, “What if once you hit a channel, it became a used chanel?” Wouldn’t that be crazy? Then, it disappeared? Once it was a used chanel, you could not see it again for like the entire day. You probably wouldn’t channel surf  very much. Who wants to have a used chanel that they can’t see? That would just be lame. Alright so it wasn’t the greatest idea, but when you are sitting there, bored, watching TV, these thoughts come! Don’t deny it. You have weird ideas like this too.

Obviously I have had way too much caffeine for the day.

Glamour or Reality?

If I lived in Beverly Hills, I would definitely be a plastic surgeon. Imagine how much business you would get! All of these movie stars that have so much pressure on them to be perfect. As a plastic surgeon, you would be doing surgeries all day every day! People in Beverly Hills probably get at least a couple plastic surgeries every year. You would definitely have your hands full with all the business you would be getting.

I’m not sure if it would be that great of a life though, being a plastic surgeon. All day, you would have to hear people talk about what they don’t like about themselves. You would be encouraging them to talk about it, because that’s how you would get your business.

I think I would rather have a job that helps people in a more beneficial way. I really love doing volunteer things. I went down to Ecuador and volunteered at some orphanages. I would love to do something like that when I’m older. I would love to just travel around and do volunteer programs. I think that would be so cool and also so satisfying, knowing that you are truly doing something great for people.

Forget Beverly Hills…I want to go back to Ecuador.

I’m not quite sure how I feel about people naming their children after cities. For example, Dallas. I don’t think that’s a great name for a little boy. I think that every time people see Dallas, the first thing they think of will be Dallas, Texas. He’s always going to be asked questions of why he was named after Dallas. He won’t really know what to say, except that he really has no clue. His parents were Dallas Cowboy fans? His parents took the family dog to the animal clinic in Dallas and they saved it’s life? He really doesn’t know?

I think people should stick to people names. Not the names of cars, or cities. Leave those for objects, not people.  I also don’t like it when people name their pets with common people names. Do not name your dog Claire…I want to name my kid that. My cute little baby girl has the same name as your nasty, smelly, evil dog. Awesome. That is not okay. There are so many names you could pick for a dog, why did you have to pick a people name?

Maybe we could all just stick to normal names. Cities can be named city names. Pets can be named pet names. And people can be named people names. Sound good?

Do you ever talk back to the TV? You are probably thinking, “No…that’s really weird.” Well it probably is, but sometimes I get really into TV. For example, commercials. Like the really annoying ones that are like, “Are you from Albuquerque? Do you need a personal injury lawyer?”, and I answer, “No, to both of those questions. Also your annoying.” See, then you can shut the personal injuary lawyer up and change the channel. Maybe it’s a power issue.

Another example is informercials. Man, those things can be so persuasive! They are talking about a vacuum, saying, “Look! This thing has 50 times the suction of other vaccuums! You NEED this!”  I lean forward and say, “Oh my goodness! I DO need that! That thing is MAGIC! I need that right now!” I start taking my cell phone out of my pocket. I start thinking of all the things I could vaccuum up, how clean my apartment could be! Then they put pressure on even more. “If you call now, you’ll get these FREE attatchments! You are saving SO MUCH MONEY!!!! ” I start going over my bank account, do I have enough?

The commercial finally ends and I finally get my sense back and put down my phone. I walk away from the TV.

I need to stop watching infomercials.